“People can say one thing and do something totally different….” "So, for example, there have historically been more searches for porn than for weather."

(But just 25 percent of men and 8 percent of women will admit to survey researchers that they watch porn.)

“You see the darkness that is often hidden from polite society.”

“… I think people put on a front, whether it's to friends or on social media, of having things together and being sure of themselves and confident and polished. But we're all anxious. …”

“I now assume that people are going through some sort of struggle, even if you wouldn't know that from their Facebook posts.”

- Olga Khazan, "Our Searches, Ourselves"

The Atlantic (6-9-17)

Think incivility is a serious problem: 89%

Think mean-spirited political campaigns are to blame: 73%

Think rock/rap music is to blame: 67%

Think talk radio is to blame: 52%

Think their own behavior is uncivil: 1%

“Utterly dedicated to preserving their self-image of perfection, they are unceasingly engaged in the effort to maintain the appearance of moral purity. They worry about this a great deal. They are acutely sensitive to social norms and what others might think of them. They dress well, go to work on time, pay their taxes, and outwardly seem to live lives that are above reproach.

“The words ‘image,’ ‘appearance,’ and ‘outwardly’ are crucial to understanding the morality of the evil. While they seem to lack any motivation to be good, they intensely desire to appear good. Their ‘goodness’ is all on a level of pretense. It is, in effect, a lie. That is why they are the ‘people of the lie.’

“Actually, the lie is designed not so much to deceive others as to deceive themselves. They cannot or will not tolerate the pain of self-reproach.”

M. Scott Peck

Bible Reading X

Prayed Regularly X

Biblical Knowledge X

Spiritual Reputation X

Church Attendance X

Apparent Love for God X

Aware of Need for God X

A wealth of studies from the 1980's to today have led to the general conclusion that: "Secret keepers are more likely to suffer from headaches, nausea, and back pain than others, for instance, and more cases of hypertension, flu, and cancer occur among those hiding trauma."

"Dale Larson, of Santa Clara University, did a meta-analysis and found that secretive people are more depressed, shame-prone, anxious, and sensitive to judgment, which makes them both tight-lipped and vulnerable to illness."

Denial, rationalizing and minimizing fears, pain, and addictions is common among those who keep secrets. Clinical psychologist Nando Pelusi writes, "Self-deception is just artful distraction from solving the problem. By not dealing with it, I can sweep it under the rug. That becomes a temporary way to feel better, but it's not lasting."

Carlin Flora, "Unlocking the Vault,"

Psychology Today, March 7, 2017

"Howie, when I fell into sin, it was like going down in the surf for the third time. I was looking over at the shore that was filled with believers that I knew, some of whom were crying, 'Isn't that tragic?' some of whom were cursing, saying, 'You're supposed to know the Word of God; why did you allow that to happen to you?' There were some who were wringing their hands, saying, 'What can we do?' But there was only one who risked the surf to pull me out while I was going down for the third time."

Anonymous