Maryville Police Department
Control Freak
Part One
Locations & Times
Maryville PD
418 W Broadway Ave, Maryville, TN 37801, USA
Saturday 1:00 PM
Control Freak
(Notes taken from Les Parrott’s book “The Control Freak”)
The Anatomy of a Control Freak
It seems easier to be God than to love God, easier to control people than to love people.
Henri Nouwen
Introduction
Today, we will take a look at the most common characteristics of Control Freaks – whether these characteristics are clearly evident or lurking more subtly beneath the surface. Of course, the most obvious and overarching characteristics of these people is a desperate desire to be in control. But there’s more to this desire than meets the eye.
The Top 10 Qualities of a Control Freak
1. Obnoxious
a. The word obnoxious comes from the Latin noxious, which means hurtful. Control freaks cause harm. They injure nearly every relationship they have because their controlling and destructive ways.
b. Control Freaks expect everyone around him/her - even senior ranking faculty members, to do the same things they do.
c. They never hide their opinions but feel obliged to point out their colleague’s foibles and make suggestions on how they could improve.
2. Tenacious
a. Control Freaks will stick to their opinion like a pit bull holding onto a bone. It doesn’t matter how illogical their argument or how insignificant the point, they won’t let go.
b. It’s part of the Control Freak code: “Don’t ever, ever, ever give in.”
c. Once Control Freaks set their sights on a particular point or goal, there is no arguing them out of it. Compromise is unsreasonable. They are right and everyone else is wrong, End of discussion.
3. Invasive
a. Most Control Freaks have little respect for privacy and often snoop in areas that aren’t their business.
b. Control Freaks exhibit their invasive quality not so much by snooping in others belongings but by poking around in people’s private lives.
4. Obsessive
a. The lesson of the black spot on the large flipchart.
b. Most Control Freaks are not interested in the big picture.
c. They most often zero in on some minor detail that prevents them from seeing anything else.
d. They may have a suspicion that something is going wrong in a relationship, for example, so they become obsessed over every nuance of conversation and unintended gesture that the other person makes.
e. Anything can become their “black spot” as they lose perspective and neglect the big picture.
5. Perfectionistic
a. Control Freaks demand perfection of themselves and everyone else. Few things are “good enough.”
b. French writer Françoise Fenelon had to say this about perfection, “It is only imperfection that complains of what is imperfect. The more perfect we are, the more gentle and quiet we become toward the defects of others.”
Next week, we will take a look at the remaining five qualities of a Control Freak.
(Notes taken from Les Parrott’s book “The Control Freak”)
The Anatomy of a Control Freak
It seems easier to be God than to love God, easier to control people than to love people.
Henri Nouwen
Introduction
Today, we will take a look at the most common characteristics of Control Freaks – whether these characteristics are clearly evident or lurking more subtly beneath the surface. Of course, the most obvious and overarching characteristics of these people is a desperate desire to be in control. But there’s more to this desire than meets the eye.
The Top 10 Qualities of a Control Freak
1. Obnoxious
a. The word obnoxious comes from the Latin noxious, which means hurtful. Control freaks cause harm. They injure nearly every relationship they have because their controlling and destructive ways.
b. Control Freaks expect everyone around him/her - even senior ranking faculty members, to do the same things they do.
c. They never hide their opinions but feel obliged to point out their colleague’s foibles and make suggestions on how they could improve.
2. Tenacious
a. Control Freaks will stick to their opinion like a pit bull holding onto a bone. It doesn’t matter how illogical their argument or how insignificant the point, they won’t let go.
b. It’s part of the Control Freak code: “Don’t ever, ever, ever give in.”
c. Once Control Freaks set their sights on a particular point or goal, there is no arguing them out of it. Compromise is unsreasonable. They are right and everyone else is wrong, End of discussion.
3. Invasive
a. Most Control Freaks have little respect for privacy and often snoop in areas that aren’t their business.
b. Control Freaks exhibit their invasive quality not so much by snooping in others belongings but by poking around in people’s private lives.
4. Obsessive
a. The lesson of the black spot on the large flipchart.
b. Most Control Freaks are not interested in the big picture.
c. They most often zero in on some minor detail that prevents them from seeing anything else.
d. They may have a suspicion that something is going wrong in a relationship, for example, so they become obsessed over every nuance of conversation and unintended gesture that the other person makes.
e. Anything can become their “black spot” as they lose perspective and neglect the big picture.
5. Perfectionistic
a. Control Freaks demand perfection of themselves and everyone else. Few things are “good enough.”
b. French writer Françoise Fenelon had to say this about perfection, “It is only imperfection that complains of what is imperfect. The more perfect we are, the more gentle and quiet we become toward the defects of others.”
Next week, we will take a look at the remaining five qualities of a Control Freak.